It's probably one of the most widely asked questions. I call it The Quintessential Relationship Question. "How did you know he was the one?" We've been asked this multiple times since we've been married. My unsatisfactory answer is, "I just knew." Deep. In my gut. In the marrow of my bones knew.
Nate and I have played the what if game. We've asked ourselves what if I hadn't gone to USD? Would we have met later in life through another set of circumstances and fallen in love? Maybe. Would we have lived two completely different lives? Fallen in love with other people? Married them instead? Maybe. Is there really only The One that God predestined for us? Or when we say that love is a verb, are we really meaning that love is the verb of choice?
Now, I am a very sentimental person by nature. I'm always rooting for Love and Truth to win. I think Enchanted is an inspired movie and yes, I have been known to whelm up in tears 30 seconds into a Martina McBride video. But the longer I'm married the less I believe that there is a One and Only. The reality is that there are a number of people out there that you could fall in love with and make a life together. But with marriage you choose one to become your only. Maybe they were farther down the list of God's preferred people for you to marry, but when you say "I do" they jump up to number one out of one.
So how did we know? I knew intuitively because my life is guided by intuition. Nate knew in a more rational revelation because he is a logical person, ruled by reason. It's my personal opinion that part of Spirit speaking to spirit means that we'll all be given this answer in ways we understand. Nate and I made our decision to wed and now each day we choose to love and make our marriage a blessing.
But I want to hear from you so I have some more examples when my single friends ask this timeless question. How did you know that your spouse was the one?
And I leave you with a word of wisdom I heard recently. The grass is greener where you water it.
For all you marrieds out there. Enjoy your spouse today and remember to throw a little water on your marriage!
3 comments:
I always hated that answer..."You'll just know, Cayce." What?! How?? But now, that's all I can say too...It fits, it's right and you just know. Almost like God created him just for me and it's so obvious! (maybe to me and no one else, but still!) For me, I truly saw that God had been orchestrating our meeting even years before actually met so that helped too!
What a great pondering Jenny! Missy and I talk about that too. We have both come to a very similar conclusion...almost identical. Love is a choice. There are probably many people we are compatible with who's personalities would mesh well with ours, but the bottom line is we CHOOSE our mate. Thinking about it, it becomes such a powerful look at God and God's love. Does it not make our marriage relationship even more in the likeness of our relationship with Christ. For we choose God, out of God's great love for us, God gave us choice, and so too, with another intimate relationship we have the power of choice. Thanks for sharing your thoughts! See you soon!
Great question and equally great answer....I knew that I knew. No hand writing or fuzzy feeling. I agree with Cayce and Tim. There are others that could be compatible with K or I but we made a choice that we determined we would make it work with God's help. That's why living together first before the commitment really is not relevant. Marriage is less about compatibility than about commitment. I think K and I are a good example of that. We are very different. Uncle D
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