Every Heart Beat Bears Your Name!

Nate and I went to Rady Children's Hospital today here in San Diego to get a special ultrasound on our little guy's heart. Until today doctors have been telling us that there is something wrong with his heart, but they aren't exactly sure what, but most likely we're looking at heart surgery between birth and two years. Ug. So unsettling not knowing WHAT is going on. So today Nate and I were praying that we could get some answers and make a gameplan with the doctors for when our son enters the world in May.

Walking down the seemingly overly cheerful hallway of the children's hospital toward the cardiology department I had the realization that if our guy has a heart problem, then maybe he's going to not be able to oxygenate his brain properly and end up with brain damage as well. Glad I just thought of that a few short steps away from the appointment and not weeks earlier so that worry didn't have time to stew.

About 30 minutes into the ultrasound I was thinking about how much I miss our South African OBGYN who delivered our daughter. And then...a nod from God; the pediatric cardio specialist walked into the room and said hello in his South African accent. Already a good sign.

This intelligent man then proceeded to use a diagram of a heart and draw in his own illustrations as he explained (HOORAY! A DOCTOR FINALLY EXPLAINED TO US!) what is going on inside our son's heart. Not only was this doctor intelligent, he was also gifted with patience because he repeated the explanation multiple times to this concerned mom and remained with us until all questions and doubt were exhausted.

And now the diagnosis in Dr. Fripp's own words:
"There is no problem."

And now the prognosis in Dr. Fripp's own words:
"Nothing needs to be done."

For you scientifically minded people out there, our little guy has what is called a persistent left superior vena cava. Basically, everyone has a right superior vena cava and our baby also has one on the left side. Little overachiever! This is pumping some extra blood into the right atrium and making it difficult for the doctors to see and measure the mitral valve. We're going to go back in four weeks just to triple check everything, but that is really just precautionary.

So here we are. The medical journey isn't over yet, but it feels like closure is being ushered forward on our family's medical uncertainty. Nate and I were prepared to just take whatever comes one day at a time, to commit ourselves for caring for one another, and to know that we are being cared for. (Something we learned in the Great Malaria Scare of '06)

We have prayed through a path of doctors hearing news that something could seriously be wrong, to not knowing if our baby would survive being on its own after birth, to maybe a chronic heart problem, to potentially heart surgery at birth, to he simply has an extra vein and nothing is wrong. Wow, what a progression!

Thank you for your prayers. We will sleep very peacefully tonight.

Mediocre Housekeeping

I'm no housekeeper. Far from it. But there are a few little tricks I've realized that don't take long and make the whole house feel cleaner and more manageable. These are three housekeeping tricks that make me go "MMM" inside.

1. Manage the dining room table.
Yes, it is the easiest place for piles of mail, projects, diaper bags, clean laundry, and whatever else to get dumped. Ours is often hidden under mountains of grab-and-go life as we rush in and out of the house. But in those moments or days when I can keep off the clutter, it truly brings air to my lungs!

2. Mop.
Moping I can do. Mopping? I dread it. I put it off for days that turn into weeks because in my head mopping is such a dreaded ordeal. If it weren't for hosting community group at our house and my pride it may never occur. Today I timed it. After just one One Republic song and two minutes of Jimmy Eat World, the whole ordeal was done. Six minutes friends to retrieve and fill bucket, mop an entry way, hallway, dining room, kitchen, living room, and sunroom, find hidden Zofrans under the table, discipline toddler who wanted to Sharpie the furniture, and put bucket away. So if Amy Grant and Rod Stewart were dominating the airwaves the last time you mopped, go ahead and try again. It won't take more than two good songs.

3. Make the Bed.
It seems like a pointless task. Really, you're just going to crawl back in them again later. But straightening out the bed only takes a minute and it makes the entire room clean. Nate has dubbed me the Princess and the Pea because I can feel every tiny little crease or weight-distribution inconsistency with our bedding and can't fall asleep until its fixed. So if I'm going to be getting out of bed huffing and puffing pulling sheets around at night, then I might as well take a minute to make the bed in the morning and enjoy the benefits of a clean bedroom all day long.

Accessorizing

Girls. We seem to be born with two things. An opinion and a desire to be beautiful.

At younger than two, Selah Grace has long since become the dictator of her fashion. She picks out her shoes each morning and her chosen jammies each night. And in between she has a grand time adding and deleting fashion accessories that may or may not go with the season: stocking caps, beach hats, headbands, watches, necklaces, band-aids, etc. That's how we end up at toddler story time in the library wearing a cute little outfit with sparkly shoes and a striped beanie in 70 degree weather. I can't wait to see what this turns into as she grows older and dresses herself for school!

Is this a head trama? No, she just felt the need to wear all six of her headbands at once.

Mama's necklaces make the best tiaras.

This day she wanted to be a ballerina and wore her tutu and crown all afternoon.

"Chillaxing" and Keeping Our Eyes on the Big Picture

Blanket statements. Never universally true. Let's begin with one, shall we?

There seem to be two types of people: calm and high-strung. At least that is the way adults in this household can be categorized. Nate is the calm. I'll let you guess who the high-strung one is.

Nate's inner calm would have yoga gurus drooling. He walks into a room and even the yappiest of psychotic dogs lay at his feet in hopes of a belly rub. Nate's inner spirit is the Jack Johnson, acoustic fingered guitar, beach-bongo melody.

My inner calm is slightly more frenetic. So, a lot more. But I recognize this along with the need to move away from the high-strung end of the spectrum and back to where Nate is, resting in a pool of nonchalance. Being a stay-at-home-mom by profession and a perfectionist by nature, it is easy to equate being a perfect wife and perfect mom and a perfectly spotless house with success. Ha! Don't worry. I know that equation is crazy! But still, multiple times a day I have to remind myself to "chillax."

At the end of the day it will not be detrimental to our family's development if:
1. Selah eats quinoa pasta with prego sauce AGAIN for dinner.
2. There are dishes in the sink when people come over.
3. We are 10 minutes late to everything in life.

It may sound trite or roll off like a meaningless platitude, but this Leboffe household is trying to see the big picture and not sweat the small stuff. It comes easier for some of us under this roof than others, but a willingness toward the right attitude has to count for something!

Creating

There's something so central to God in creating something new. Right now we are creating in two places: in the dark, comfy confines of my womb, and in the empty room of the future nursery. Inside my tummy something magical and spiritual is happening. A person is being made!

But in our empty room we are getting a chance to imagine a new space for a new family member. It used to house icky blue carpet and precarious towers of boxes of things we haven't gone through in almost five years of marriage merge. Now it boasts a fresh coat of paint and new carpet, but is still rather barren. Although I moan about how long it seems to take babies to grow, it's a good thing that God gives us time to prepare a place for them in our homes and hearts.

Here's a picture of our little guy's space now:

Here's a "before" picture of our little guy's future space:

Yep, pretty boring right now. Nate and I are throwing around some ideas right now to make a big impact on a low budget. Think fabric, trees, kites, and tesselations. Stay tuned for the big reveal in a month or so when we get it done!

My Valentine

Nate knows that I don't want a little glass swan vase with a rose and a bow on it from the grocery store on Valentine's Day. No thank you. While I didn't get flowers from my husband this past Sunday, he did get me something that showed me just how much he cares.

Nothing says love to a pregnant lady like carne asada fries. Thanks, Hubby. I love you too.






















(Yes, I do realize these look absolutely disgusting. And yes, I do know these are NOT on the Jillian Michael's approved diet plan.)